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Why Can't God Save Me?



In my metaphysics class this passed semester, we proved the existence of God. And for the first time in my life, I couldn’t escape the reality that God is 100% real. And while that should have brought me joy and comfort, I realized that now I had to understand there is a great God that exists and yet there is so much devastation and bad things in this world. But if God did exist, which I proved He did, then how could He possibly allow all of these bad things to happen? And why was I blessed with so much while the girl next to me is suffering and barely hanging in there?

The movie ‘The Passion of the Christ’ shows the story of Jesus being crucified. And there is one part of the movie that every time I watch it, it feels like someone is stabbing my already broken heart. The part that I am talking about is when Jesus is being hung and he screams out ‘why’ to God right before he asks God to forgive the people because they do not know what they are doing. Every time I see that, I ask myself, in that moment why couldn’t God save Him? Of course, we all know now, after the situation, that Jesus had to die in order to save us. But in that moment, I have to wonder if people who believed in Jesus and loved him asked the same question but had to trust God and God’s plan.

We go through a similar situation every day. It is not as extreme or important as Jesus dying to save us all, but we go through painful experiences for a reason that are not always explainable. And sometimes we will cry out to God and ask why us, why can’t He step in and help us? If He is so good, why is there so much bad in the world? However, we don’t know the ending to our own story. We don’t know why we must go through all the bad things, and sometimes it seems like we are having to go through it for no reason. But there is a reason for every single situation we go through.

We are never going to enjoy having to go through a crisis. While knowing God has a plan for us despite the situations we may be going through, it is never going to ease the anxiety and pain within us. But these things happen for a reason. Whether that reason is to teach us, prepare us, or make us stronger, everything that happens is necessary. I know it is hard to believe that especially when people are dying from diseases we do not yet have cures for or when people are still treating each other so cruelly. But we have to trust God, we have to trust that there is a plan. But most importantly, we must continue to do good. Even when everything is pushing against us, we must get up and fight back. We may go through unthinkable things and we may not understand why now, but we can never give up on ourselves and our purpose no matter what purpose you believe is. We don’t know exactly how we are contributing to God’s plan, but that shouldn’t stop us from doing what we were meant to do.



Book Series Reading List!



The Lunar Chronicles.
Cinder is a cyborg mechanic who is ruled by her mother and step sisters. After one of her step sisters tragically died from a plague that has been spreading all across New Beijing, she is blamed for the death and outcasted by the ‘family’ that took care of her. Soon, Cinder will find that not only is she immune to the plague, but she has some unknown secrets that could change the world.

(I just did a huge book review series on these books because of how amazing they are. Personally my favorite was Cress and I encourage you to read to whole series just so you can read Cress!)

Passenger Series.
PASSENGER | WAYFARER
Etta Jones is an aspiring violinist who will be making her debut. Nicholas is a sailor who has traveled much in the past. Etta is thrown from her regular life when she becomes a prisoner on a ship. Nicholas and Etta must sail to unimaginable places while trying to survive and return Etta to her regular life.

The Illuminae Files.
Kady and Ezra broke up the morning before their planet was invaded. Little did anyone know that there is a war going on for their planet. Now, Kady and Ezra must work together and fight their way to evacuate. But that’s not their only problem. There is now a deadly plague on the rise, and if Kady and Ezra want to survive, they’re going to need each other.

Grisha Verse Series.
Alina Starkov has always been the outcast. Now, war has broken out and her best friend has been badly injured. Alina reveals she may be a little more important than once believed when she reveals she has a power that saves his life. Her power may be the key to helping her city that has been badly damaged by the war.
Red Queen Series.
The world is divided based on blood whether it is red or silver. Silver bloods rule while red bloods are the commoners. Mara, despite being a red blood, has a dangerous gift that may disrupt this balance and could potentially be the downfall for the silver ruling. But, her gift may cause more trouble then previously expected.
Six of Crows Series.
In order for Kaz to become rich he must pull off one of the largest heists. To do so, he has to assemble a group of dangerous criminals. But nothing is ever civilized when a team of criminals unite.
The Selection Series.
Prince Maxon must choose his future queen out of 35 girls. This is a dream for most girls because it is a chance for them to escape the lives they have and enter into a new lavish life. This dream, however, is not for America. To America, the selection means she will lose people she loves, but will the prince help convince her that maybe the royal life is for her?
Twisted Tales Series.
A twisted tale takes a classic Disney fairytale and changes a key aspect of the story. See how different fairytales could have been a completely different story with a single change. The current rewritten fairytales include Aladdin, Sleeping Beauty, Beauty and the Beast, Mulan, and Ariel.  
The Shadow Game Series.
 ACE OF SHADES | KING OF FOOLS | UNTITLED
Enne Salta has always followed the rules. But, after her mother goes missing, Enne will have to step out of her comfort zone and do things she never would have guessed she could do in order to save her mom. Enne will be forced to play a dangerous game.
(King of fools and Untitled have not been released yet.)
Caraval Series.
The Caravel only comes to town once a year and this year Scarlet and Tella will be attending the show. However, upon arrival, Tella is kidnapped and is now the focal point for the game the show revolves around. Whoever finds Tella first will be declared the winner, and if Scarlet wants to find her sister, she is going to be forced to play the game.